I just finished reading Muhammad MAGHOUT's latest book.. "East of Eden, West of God... - شرق عدن، غرب الله..."... all I know is that I have to talk about it.. I have to say sth.. the only problem is that I can't... I wish i had the ability to describe feelings, paint them.. I can't.. I can only scream them out.. this bitterness that rolls all over u when reading this book.. bitterness is the keyword for this compilation... I donno... the only ppl who would realy understand what I'm talking about.. is those who had read his "I Will Betray My Country - سأخون وطني"...

أيها الوطن الغارق في التفاهات
لن أنقذك مهما كان عندي من وسائل
فلطالما أسأتَ إليَ
من الرأس حتى أسفل القدم
حرمتني رؤية النجوم
تأمل الأفق
انتظار الفجر
رائحة الخبز
رسائل الحب
هدايا الأعياد
وحتى النوم على الرصيف
كنت تدفعني دفعاً
بجبالك وسهولك وثرواتك
للجنون
للمصحات العقلية
ومعسكرات الإبادة
وأنا أسترضيك
وأستعطفك
والآن تريد أن أنظف ما تحتك وفوقك من خراب
وقد حذرتك مراراً
بأن الزمن ليس ساعة حول معصمك
أو قبعة على رأسك
أو سوطاً بيدك
أو حاجباً أمام مكتبك
عفواً
ليس عندي وقت أضيعه فعندي موعد هام
مع عاهرة!
ومصابة بالإيدز والزهايمر.
فمت بغيظك...

Only words like these can actually take ur mind off what's going on.. can actually make u forget that Samir QASIR was blown off last week, that someone like Naji al-ALI isn't safe with his pen, that Major General Mustafa TLAS is talking in his diaries about his top of the line sterility treatment, that Mr. Saber FALHOUT is demanding the abolishment of the "Emergency Law" that he himself announced 42 years ago.. that the same ppl who were responsible for the Tadmur masacre are now the angels of democracy and reform...
All I want.. is to be able to breathe, I just... when I have my asthma fit, I wanna be able to open the window and actually BREATHE!! I wanna breathe...I don't wanna be afraid to show how much I love this land!! IS THAT TOO FUCKING MUCH TO ASK?!!!!


*The text is titled "A Treason Draft - مشروع خيانة" from the "East of Eden, West of God... - شرق عدن، غرب الله..." book..